Restless

I've been feeling very out of sorts lately. My life is obviously chaotic but thanks to a few minor miracles I have some surer footing. But something just feels wrong. I can't put my finger on it but....just wrongness....everywhere. When I wake up...wrong...when I lay down....wrong...when I go to work...wrong...I don't know. It's really annoying. I'm distracted by it. There are big holes in my world right now and I'm trying frantically to patch them like a leaky boat. I feel like someone has turned the hourglass on me and now time is running out. Oh well. Until it does, I'll just keep on eating, sleeping, fighting for no apparent reason, other than there's nothing better to do. I wish I could have a do over. All around. My whole life, a do over, that's what I need. I have lots of broken pieces and not enough glue to put me back together. If I started from scratch maybe I could salvage something out of the mess that is me. Somehow I doubt it. I'm just so tired. Not as hopeless but sleepy and in need of a good snuggle. Cuddle party, that's what I need. I'm just too little to do all of this. Too little. Little piglet. Gonna get turned into bacon. But I guess I will do it, all of it. Because life isn't supposed to be easy and this is my story. I get to choose what characters stay and what one's get written out. So once upon a time...yes this is a fairy tale, because I say so.